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Wednesday, August 19, 2015

Real life gore vs.fictional gore

Not many people know my little secret and most people wouldn't believe it. 

As a child I fainted at the sight of blood, even today blood makes me queasy and faint. When there's a bad car wreck along the road and most people slow and gawk at the wreckage and injured people. I keep my head straight and drive on. When I see someone bleeding profusely my first instinct is to help them but the amount of blood turns my stomach, I sweat, and grow lightheaded. 

I have no problem though watching gory movies, reading horror books full of blood and spine tingling gore. I even write blood and death into my books without a second thought.

Calm before the Storm Excerpts

His father opened his eyes for a brief second while choking on his own blood. It coursed from his throat and drenched his clothes, covering the recliner. Evan's lips curled into a sneer, his eyes glowed from the rush of watching the big man gurgle.

He slashed using the strength in his arm. Again and again he slashed. The area below her head a mangled mess. Pieces of flesh clung to vertebra, a scarlet river soaked the bed, already puddling on the floor below.  

Today I had a biopsy and freaked out at the doctor. My mind envisioned a needle going into my flesh and pulling at it. The flesh ripping away from the flesh beside it. I became light headed after my initial anxiety attack and nearly fainted in the chair. While I waited for the procedure my body cramped. And now an hour later shooting pains are rushing through my body. I'm sure they are phantom pains as the procedure was truly very simple. My mind made more of it than it was. However the pain feels very real.

The difference in my reactions to blood is real life means truly happening. Real blood and mangled flesh. Books, movies are fiction. They are figments of someone's twisted imagination and don't bother me.

I'm a blood wimp and I admit it.

And in case your wondering I'm fine. The biopsy was merely a precaution.

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